PHOENIX RISES COUNSELING LLC SPECIALIZES IN HELPING professionals achieve measurable relief from emotional anguish
THERAPY for relationship problems
&
ATTACHMENT TRAUMA
Quit dating limes and holding on to sour grapes. OVERCOME RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS AND CREATE HEALTHY, LASTING LOVE.
Online therapy in Seattle, SPOKANE, and across WAshington state; Los Angeles and California coming up in 2026
“RELATIONSHIPS JUST DON’T WORK OUT FOR ME. I GUESS I’M MEANT TO BE ALONE.”
“I don’t know why i can’t leave. maybe this is as good as it is going to get. Maybe it’s all I can have. what if I leave and end up alone and depressed?“
“WHEN I’M IN A RELATIONSHIP, I BECOME AWFULLY CLINGY. I’M FINE WHEN I’M ALONE, BUT AS SOON AS I GET ATTACHED, I ABANDON MYSELF FOR MY PARTNER. I GO OVER THE EDGE IF THEY DON’T RESPOND TO MY TEXTS RIGHT AWAY.”
“If they really knew me, they wouldn’t like me and leave. I don’t trust people. Sometimes I feel like there is something wrong with me. Maybe I am just too broken.”
You are not broken. You have done nothing wrong. You did the best you knew how.
This is not who you are. It’s how you adapted to harsh living conditions when you didn’t have many options.
Don’t settle. YOU DESERVE TO LOVE AND BE LOVED.
THESE FEELINGS STARTED EARLY, DIDN’T THEY?
They have been with you for so long that they feel as if they are part of your personality.
They aren’t.
You know love doesn’t include yelling, pushing, hitting, or simply giving you the cold shoulder for hours or days. But how do you get it to stop? You think of leaving, but the idea is terrifying and feels as if it would rip your heart out.
You can’t speak your mind in your relationship. They will get upset, tell you “you are imagining things”, berate you and tel you why you are so wrong, or storm out the door and leave… Again.
When you are in a relationship, you engage in major “people-pleasing” so they don’t leave. You have silenced your inner voice and your true self so many times that you barely know what you truly want anymore.
You engage in one bad relationship after another. Every time it seems like this is “the one”. Then it goes sour. You’re not sure if true love really exists or if it’s a Hollywood sales gimmick to get us all to buy movie tickets and cry over what we can’t have.
You want someone who listens to you, who truly hears you, who cares. Someone who will give you alone time when you need it, or get it when you just need a hug. Someone you can laugh with and have fun, enjoy sex as much as shared dinner. Someone to build a life with. Is this too much to ask for?
Perhaps you can’t even imagine getting emotionally close and intimate. Perhaps it’s nearly impossible to trust, because you’ve been hurt so many times. Maybe you’ve quit relationships altogether, but you feel lonely and dissatisfied regardless.
Perhaps relationships have never been safe. Not since you were born. You’ve left your childhood home behind, hoping to find a different life, but your past repeats itself as if you’re running a program you can’t escape.
Growing up wasn’t a picnic and you did whatever you could to survive. You still do. You’re an excellent survivor, but you were hoping to thrive one day, not just survive.
You grew an armor to get to where you are today and hold it all together, but you’re exhausted, sad, or on bad days, maybe even bitter.
You are so tired of the constant arguing. The break up - make up cycle. Tired of dating another lime and walking away more hopeless than before.
YOU’VE TRIED EVERYTHING TO BE LUCKY IN LOVE, BUT IT HASN’T WORKED.
SOMETIMES, YOU FEEL…
Welcome to Phoenix Rises Counseling. I am Veronika Stutz, LMHC.
Please call me Vivi.
I believe it can be done.
CHANGE IS IN OUR NATURE. THE BODY IS DESIGNED TO ADAPT, GROW AND HEAL. THE BRAIN POSSESSES NEUROPLASTICITY - THE ABILITY TO GROW OR REORGANIZE NEURAL NETWORKS. WE ARE MADE TO CONTINUE ADAPTING TO OUR ENVIRONMENT; PHYSICALLY, STRUCTURALLY, NEUROLOGICALLY, AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY.
I am an EMDRIA-certified EMDR therapist. I specialize in trauma, and I conceptualize symptoms through a trauma-informed lens.
WE CAN ENGAGE THE INNATE ADAPTABILITY OF OUR BRAINS AND NERVOUS SYSTEMS FOR NATURAL HEALING.
I am an experienced guide with a powerful lantern. I know a way out of the dark tunnel because I've been there many times. I know that the scary shadows on the walls can't hurt you if we flash my lantern and pass by them, leaving the past where it belongs.
I'll take your hand, and I won't let go unless you want me to. We’ll walk together until you safely reach the light.
This is where I can assist you best:
Does it feel like it's not getting better no matter what you do?
What if you have been treating the symptoms but not the cause?
* Has therapy made you feel better, but never brought about the profound changes you hoped for?
* Do you wonder if you are “too broken” or “unfixable” and therapy doesn’t work for you?
* Do you wonder if you might have to settle for going through life in semi-resignated acceptance that this is as good as it gets?
* Does your career require you to maintain a persona or a facade, and no one would guess how dark your thoughts can become sometimes? Do you feel exhausted, like a burned out actor in your own life?
* Do you struggle with thoughts or emotions that can get out of control, as if your emotional brain hijacked your body?
* Do you feel demoralized, hopeless, or numb?
* Do relationships tend to go sour?
* Do you feel like you can’t keep going like this anymore, but you don’t know what to do about it?
What if you’ve been chopping away at the leaves and branches of a weed, but the leaves keep growing back because you didn’t know you needed to pull the weed out by its root?
What if trauma is at the root of anxiety, depression, relationship problems, substance abuse, workaholism, busy-aholism, social anxiety, low self-esteem, and many other ailments?
Trauma is an event that diminishes your previous capacity.
Trauma can be hard to detect. Trauma can begin in the third trimester before birth and affect brain development in a fetus.
Trauma can be small, such as unintentional neglect in childhood because older siblings overwhelmed the parents.
Unrecognized and untreated trauma can leave you feeling distrustful of yourself, out of control, numb, untreatable, or “crazy”.
Heal your Heart. Live with Ease. Thrive with confidence.
I help creative professionals understand how traumatic past events manifest as emotional problems in the present. Together, we rewrite old scripts and exit negative cycles through neurological change.
You can move from “making it through the day” to “flourishing emotionally” even if it seemed impossible before, too time-consuming, too painful, ineffective, and too disruptive.
When you identify the root cause, targeted healing can begin.
* You can leave the past where it belongs and move forward. You can experience post-traumatic growth, and integrate your experience in a way that leaves you stronger than before.
*You can learn why you continue attracting partners that aren’t good for you, and make different choices.
* You can learn to love again. Starting with yourself.
* You can turn a new chapter in intimate relationships; one that doesn’t have “mayhem” in the headline.
* You can learn to feel your feelings again. What an inner “no” feels like. What an inner “yes” feels like. And then you can learn to speak your mind, unapologetically, without becoming unkind.
* You can learn to recognize people who aren’t good for you, and those who aren’t.
* You can get over him/her/them. You can move past the divorce, betrayal, and heartbreak. You can even move out and leave with a good ol’ “Good riddens!”
* You can learn how to make self-honoring choices in any relationship.
* You can be calm when he/she/they don’t call or respond to your texts right away, because you feel securely attached. You can learn to recognize when they are not leaving you.
* You can rewrite your family script and disrupt the cycles of abuse and neglect that have been passed down the generations. It can stop with you, now.
* You can learn to “love from afar” when necessary. You can do conscious uncoupling and conscious coupling, or conscious coparenting. On your terms, the terms that are written on your heartstrings.
working together is simple.
THE PROCESS OF THERAPY
1) Preparation: ASSESSMENT, DIAGNOSIS, TREATMENT PLAN
Generally, we will meet 1-2x per week for 60-90 minutes at your appointed time.
For the first 2 sessions, we meet for 90 minutes to complete an assessment together, identify a diagnosis if you want one (unless you’re an insurance client, then we must add a diagnosis), identify your goals, and make a treatment plan.
2) The beginning stage: Playing puzzle
We get to know each other until we know and trust each other. Since we don’t want to waste any time, we’ll start by spilling all the puzzle pieces of your life on the table. We’ll look at each piece and see how they all fit together until we have a coherent picture.
We’ll start an EMDR case conceptualization and possibly do a brief demo of how EMDR works.
We may use Gestalt therapy/parts work/Ego States therapy. You’ll playfully give different personality parts, thoughts, feelings, or memories a voice until your entire inner committee feels heard and understood. It’s a bit like role-playing or theater, and it saves you from “talking about it”. You’ll just … spill it. I’ll show you and support you, and we make it fun. Of course, I’ll always be open to your feedback, and you don’t have to use interventions you don’t like.
We may learn cognitive-behavioral strategies and behavioral supports as necessary, such as learning Dialectical Behavior Therapy skills by workbook or groups, or creating action-plans to begin changing habits.
We’ll engage in EMDR resourcing, which means strengthening the part of you that is wise, capable, skilled, heroic, resilient, and so very lovable and worthy.
3) The intermediate stage: Detective work
We’ll start the detective work of seeking the needle in the haystack, which we do by riding feelings back in time to the earliest time you remember feeling this way. We may give parts a voice again to find out what “decisions” you made about life at a time when you were too young to know the final truth about life. We’ll identify limiting beliefs that may have kept you safe at the time but are no longer needed.
We’ll identify negative core beliefs about yourself that are associated to traumatic experiences.
From here, we’ll either continue parts work and engage in Healing of Memories or self-parenting, move into EMDR processing, or alternate and mix modalities depending on what works best for you.
4) The end stage: The Harvest
We continue EMDR processing until you report no symptoms, we see behaviors change positively, you reached your goals, we measure your progress on a scale from 0-10, and we determine that you have achieved significant change.
When we are certain that you are satisfied with the improvements, we switch to bi-weekly therapy sessions to taper off and see how you do on your own. After a month or so, we’ll officially end therapy and switch to voluntary wellness visits. This means that you can schedule irregular single sessions to check in.
POLYAMORY, ETHICAL NON-MONOGAMY INDIVIDUALS AND COUPLES
Please check the process on the specialty page. Since there are many different scenarios in polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, monogamous couples counseling, kink, and various combinations, the process of intervention requires more flexibility. When in doubt, schedule a free consultation.
the FREE CONSULTATION
1) Click on the “Schedule Your Free Consultation” button. It will take you to my secure client platform Simple Practice, where you can schedule a meeting. You can also email me directly at vivi@phoenixrisescounseling.org, or use the contact form to ask for a meeting time that is not listed. I may be able to see you earlier if someone cancels.
2) I will either confirm your consultation through Simple Practice, or email you additional availabilities.
3) You will receive an email from Simple Practice, giving you access to the portal. For a consultation, please fill out the Informed Consent for a Telehealth Consultation form. (Simple Practice is so easy to navigate, even I can do it.) If you run into problems, email me.
4) A few hours before your appointment, Simple Practice will send you an email with a link to access the virtual consultation. Try the link ahead of time. Some cell phones require you to download an app. Desktops or laptops won’t.
5) We’ll meet! I will ask you what brings you into therapy and what your goals are. You can ask me anything and I will do my best to address your concerns. We will connect informally to get to know each other, but observe professional boundaries.
SEE MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL
THE TRAUMA THERAPY LIFERAFT
CLICK HERE:
This therapy is for you if:
* You have been in therapy before and you’re looking for a quantum leap
* You have an understanding of your mental/emotional processes and you can verbalize them
* You can verbalize your goals
* You’re done being an externalizer, and you appreciate personal responsibility for thoughts and feelings
* You are ready for measurable change, and able to commit to a window of time to achieve it
* You can stay present in your body and maintain present awareness, or you’re willing to take the extra time to achieve this ability before we can engage in trauma work
* You appreciate humor. Humor is a therapeutic intervention, not a sign of lacking professionalism.
* You seek a real relationship with an authentic therapist while maintaining professional boundaries. No blank slate here, that’s so last century.
This therapy is not for you if:
* You experience active substance abuse that requires a level of care I can’t offer. If we find out this is the case, I will refer you.
* You experience a mood disorder that requires a level of care I can’t offer.
* You are actively suicidal and you may need around-the-clock support, which I can’t offer in a solo practice
* You are unable to make a regular time commitment of 6-12 months
What others are saying about my work:
Due to confidentiality, I can’t quote previous clients. I often hear that our shared work has ‘changed lives”, “exceeded expectations” and made clients feel “heard and understood like they haven’t been before”. Client feedback often moves me to tears and I feel privileged and grateful to be able to do this work.
I can, however, quote colleagues who recommend me:
“Veronika is a compassionate and caring EMDR practitioner. She is innately tuned into the needs of her clients. I recommend her to men and women who have experienced abusive childhoods and/or relationships and are yearning for big life changes.“
“Also, X shared how impactful you have been to her over the past year and it was so touching. It made my eyes fill up with tears thinking of how meaningful your work is in this world. You truly are a lovely, kind and compassionate soul.” Ellie Kane, LMHC
“Veronika is a highly skilled, warm, and caring therapist. She has extensive experience treating grief and CPTSD and is an expert in treating poly, kink, and ENM couples and individuals. She excels at helping her clients achieve their goals.“ Milena Gordillo, MSW, LICSW
But…
It’s a lot of money.
Yes, I get it. It’s a significant investment.
However, at a higher fee, I can see fewer clients. This enables me to dedicate more time, focus, thought, continuing education, peer consultation, mentoring, professional EMDR consultation, and energy to you. Higher fees mean I can provide premium service. You are not just a number in a factory-style healthcare mill, but a unique person I can get to know as intimately as you let me. I can commit to your care at a much higher level. We’ll get more done in less time.
It’s not a good time.
It’s never a good time for life changes. It’s definitely never a good time to look at what we prefer to avoid. If we as humans had it our way, we wouldn’t change at all because the timing’s never quite right to leave our comfort zone.
But the right time is never coming unless you make it so, and your lifetime passes by every day regardless.
It’s too disruptive.
It’s a valid concern if you’re steeped in responsibilities and demands. However, it doesn’t have to be disruptive. I’ve often read that most EMDR processing happens between sessions or even in your sleep because we activate a natural healing process in the brain. And that’s without homework.
Besides, I’ll make you a deal. If I don’t listen sensitively to your needs and adjust to your unique pacing, you get to fire me.
It’s too painful.
You may have been disappointed in the past by endlessly “talking about it” and feeling worse after therapy. Maybe you couldn’t function as well in your busy life, and you don’t want to take the risk again. But it can be different if we strengthen your positive parts/memories at the beginning of therapy and the end of every session so you don’t go back to life in emotional turmoil.
If I don’t listen and take your feedback into account, fire me. Healing is work, yes. You may be uncomfortable. But if you’re hurting more than before, we need to adjust the treatment approach so you can tolerate it. “No pain, no gain” is sooo 1980s.
You’re worth it.
Money can be replaced. Lifetime can’t.
YOUR LIFETIME AND LIFE QUALITY ARE YOUR MOST VALUABLE ASSETS.
Trauma is not who you are, it’s what happened to you.
Together, we’ll make sense of it in a way that leaves you stronger than before.
FEE SCHEDULE
60-minute therapy/EMDR: $160
90-minute therapy/EMDR: $240
90-minute IADC therapy: $250
60-minute couples counseling: $180
90-minute couples counseling: $270
I offer out-of-network benefits and I will provide superbills for insurance reimbursement.
PLEASE NOTE:
Insurance doesn’t pay or reimburse for IADC.
investing in MENTAL HEALTH can change LIVES.
I currently still accept Aetna, Kaiser PPO, and First Choice Health. I am in the process of phasing out Aetna.
I offer Premera out-of-network benefits. Please feel free to inquire about details.
Contact me
Let’s get started.
I WILL answer your questions and we can decide if I’m the right therapist for you.
For the protection of your Personal Health Information, get in touch with me through my Hippa-compliant email:
vivi [at] phoenixrisescounseling [dot] org
You can also request an appointment directly in my Simple Practice schedule by using the red button ”Request Appointment”.
If you want a free consultation earlier or at a different time than the online schedule permits, email me directly.
A Good Faith Estimate is available upon request.
My license number in Washington state is LH 61526615.
vivi [at] phoenixrisescounseling [dot] org
BUSINESS ADDRESS
Phoenix Rises Couseling LLC
Veronika Stutz, LMHC, C-EMDR
License number in Washington state: LH 61526615.
Howard St. STE W, #6727, Spokane, WA 99201